Tuesday, December 23, 2014

The Mystery of Spiritual Hibernation and Johnny Cash




Well I have been listening to a lot of Johnny Cash lately. Did you know that Johnny Cash has Christian Music and that I have not been listening to a lot of Christmas Music?  This may strike you as odd as Christmas approaches that I'd be listening to Johnny Cash because most people have been listening to Christmas songs. I guess I am looking at this Christmas from a different point of view. There is a human element to Johnny Cash's music that seems to have been lost in a large amount of our music today. I pulled his music out of hibernation from my memory bank and I believe we need to pull the souls that we do not see very often out of spiritual hibernation from Jesus one prayer at a time this Christmas, but we need to be willing to journey with them one step at a time. Johnny Cash speaks to the heart of the struggles of life from many different perspectives in the world and I think there are a few songs of his that need to be pulled out of the cave of hibernation and that need to be revisited.



A few songs by Johnny Cash I'd recommend listening to are: "The Gospel Road" - "What On Earth" - "Have a drink of Water" - "Paradise" - "Do Lord" - "I am a Pilgrim" - "I was there when it happened" - "The Way Worn Traveler" - "Wildwood in the Pines" 




All too often we look for what is next or what is new, but do we really need new things?

What if what we already have needs be re-awakened or revisited or reviewed or renewed?

What if we re-visit the places (physically or mentally or spiritually) we have visited only one time, but changed our lives forever?

Have you heard of any of the songs listed above? If not, you must ponder the lyrics. The reality of the struggle that Johnny Cash went through of living a life of holiness and struggling with the attractiveness of sin is a place for common ground for most. Johnny Cash was not perfect, but he tried to live a life of holiness. He spoke to many hearts in many different walks of life. But you know what? Jesus speaks to all hearts in any way he can to teach us how to receive his love and mercy and how to be human on this journey we call life.  Our hearts speak a language and we need to listen to what moves our hearts. For example, when you listen to music, pay attention to what moves your heart and press the pause button and talk to the Lord about it. By the way, talking to Jesus about what moves our heart goes for everything in life. He is trying to tell you something about yourself or himself through the movements of your heart. We must learn to press pause in our lives. It's ok. You can do it. Relax.



Check out some of Johnny Cash's more famous songs and listen to reality of what some people go through that need the message of Jesus: "Folsom Prison Blues" - "Rock Island Line" - "Country Boy" - "Doin' my time" - "One Piece at a time" 

Maybe you are thinking, "What are you trying to get at?" Well one thing I am trying to point us to realize is that every year we have hundreds of people that come to Church only on Christmas. They come out of their habit of hibernating from Jesus and the incarnation, but never come back until the next Christmas.  They come in possibly not knowing why they are there in the first place, but every year they are not invited or even acknowledged as a someone who possesses the same dignity as everyone else. However, how often do YOU reach out to one of those weary travelers who are unaware of the love and mercy of Christ?

Here is my challenge for you this Christmas: 

  • Reach out to one person you see at Church on Christmas Eve and on Christmas Day and talk to them about their story. Ask them questions about their family life. Ask them how they came to be who they are today.
  • The goal is to let one person feel that they are the most important person in the world for those few grace filled seconds.
  • This is not impossible. There may be one soul that just wants to be noticed or even feel loved.
  • Maybe buy a gift and bring it to Church with you and ask the Lord to reveal to you one person who may need a gift. Be Creative!
    • Ask yourself: Do I truly care for the salvation of anyone's soul besides my own? If you do, then go out there and take some chances. 
      • Christmas is about surprises. 
        • Surprise: God became human because he wants to save you and love you! Will you surprise someone with the gift of charity and/or community this Christmas?
Now is the time to be "doin' your time" with Jesus as you travel "The Gospel Road" because "I am a pilgrim" and you are a pilgrim. We need to "have a drink of water" with those hibernating souls and share the living water (Jn 4 ) with those who do not know the gift of God.



You can do it! I believe in you! Now is the time to have some fun and share the good news of the Incarnation of God in the Divine Person of Jesus Christ!

This is the mystery of life: To allow our relationship with Jesus to become incarnate.




Merry Christmas! 

Living in the Mystery,

Zach Weber

Friday, November 21, 2014

The Mystery of Thanksgiving, A Crucifix, and Musician Emma Fradd

Well the Lord is supplying grace and it can overflowing at times in my life and sometimes it doesn't feel that way at all. I desire to share this with you all to hopefully give you hope and possibly some clarity. At times, it is tempting to wonder what is going on in our lives. How can we make sense of the troubling nonsense that seems to catch us off guard.  Immediately when we are caught off guard we tend to focus on ourselves and that disposition tends to block any receptivity of turning to Jesus, who should become our main focus in life. May I recommend simply gazing at the crucifix and kissing it. Do not worry about what others think. It is time we all detach from what others think and enter into the mystery. The spiritual world is very real, but doesn't always make sense when we take our eyes off of Jesus Crucified. Does it make any sense that we are healed by the wounds of Jesus? It's a mystery that only the heart can understand because sometimes the language of love is found in mere spoken words, rather it is expressed in a physical act of sorrow that satiates our longing for heaven while we sojourn on earth.

For Catholics the crucifix is a normal part of every Church and hopefully is a part of every home. If you do not currently have one in your home, I encourage you to purchase one, have a priest bless it this Sunday, and place it in a place that you will be seen every day.  The mystery of what Jesus continues to do for us should cause us to stop often and say a prayer of thanksgiving for how he continues to teach us how to divinize our human nature. However, not all understand why we have a crucifix as a part of our faith and I hope to shed some light in that darkness. That darkness looks different to all of us, but we are not called to remain in darkness, we are called to remain/abide in him as he remains/abides in us (cf John 15). The crucified Christ heals us and St. Augustine Confirms this when he wrote, "As then formerly he who looked to the serpent that was lifted up, was healed of its poison, and saved from death, so now he who is conformed to the likeness of Christ's death by faith and the grace of baptism, is delivered both from sin by justification, and from death by the resurrection: as He himself said," That whosoever believes in me shall not perish, but have life everlasting." 




So why do we have a crucifix in our Churches and hopefully in our houses. Well, if you have been attending Mass the past few days you were being fed the Word of God from the Book of Revelation. Yesterday, the Church providentially read Revelation 5:1-10. While reading, look at the words through the perspective of a crucifix.




1And I saw in the right hand of him who was seated on the throne a scroll written within and on the back, sealed with seven seals; 2and I saw a strong angel proclaiming with a loud voice, "Who is worthy to open the scroll and break its seals?" 3And no one in heaven or on earth or under the earth was able to open the scroll or to look into it, 4and I wept much that no one was found worthy to open the scroll or to into into it. 5Then one of the elders said to me, "Weep not; lo, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Root of David, has conquered, so that he can open the scroll and its seven seals." 6And between the throne and the four living creatures and among the elders, I saw a Lamb standing, as though it had been slain, with seven horns and with seven eyes, which are the seven spirits of God sent out into all the earth; 7and he went and took the scroll from the right hand of him who was seated on the throne. 8And when he had taken the scroll, the four living creatures and the twenty-four elders fell down before the Lamb, each holding a harp, and with golden bowls full of incense, which are the prayers of the saints; 9and they sang a new song, saying, "Worthy art thou to take the scroll and to open its seals, for thou wast slain and by thy blood didst ransom men for God from every tribe and tongue and people and nation, 10and hast made them a kingdom and priests to our God, and they shall reign on earth."









Did you see it? Did you hear the chant at the Mass before we receive our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament? Lamb of God, Lamb of God, You take away the sins of the World (CF Jn 1:29 & Rev. 12:11) . Think of the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. Who opens the word? Who alone can alone unlock the Word of God? It is the Slain Lamb, who is Jesus Christ our Paschal Lamb. Who is nailed to the Cross other than the Slain Lamb, Jesus Christ? Only he can open the Word of God that seems sealed shut when at times we try to read it and it does not speak to our hearts. However, just as at Mass, we must read his word in the presence of a crucifix. The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass is Biblical in more ways than I can explain, but hopefully this opens the door of your heart a little more as to why Catholics have a crucifix in every Church and hopefully in their homes. Only the lamb that was slain is worthy to receive and break open its seals for Christ was slain and his blood was purchased for God for everyone in the world.

So how can we dive deeper into this mystery of the Crucifix? I would recommend and encourage 6 things:
1) Say you are sorry and repent (metanoia) by turning back to daily to Jesus Christ
2) Humble yourself by getting on your knees daily and surrender your life to Jesus Christ for 30 seconds (Be not afraid – John Paul II).
3) Ask to be an instrument of his peace daily and say please! (Saint Francis of Assisi)
4) Carry a crucifix in your pocket daily and hold it often. This will hopefully allow you say a short prayer that allows you to remember to pray so you can remain in communion with Jesus. (Corinthians 1:23 – St. Paul: But we preach Christ crucified . . .) I often pray the Jesus prayer when I hold my crucifix to pray always.
5) Contemplate the pierced side of Jesus. Pope Emeritus Benedict says that love begins at the pierced side of Christ (see Deus Caritas Est). Use your imagination creatively and pray in a disposition that he stirs in your heart. The spear that pierced Jesus’ side represents our sin and the blood and water that flows out represents birth to the Church, cleansing of our sins, and mercy for us so that we may become more merciful (CF Jn 3:30 – He must increase, I must decrease).
6) At some point in your day say a litany of thanksgiving for all that Jesus is doing. Thanksgiving is right around the corner for the world, but it should be an every day occurrence for Christians. To recognize and believe that Jesus is truly present Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus in the Eucharist. To understand his true presence we must become Eucharistic - become thankful always. Yes that means for everything (think of St. Therese the Little Flower). It’ll change your life forever! This is the beautiful mystery of Catholic Theology and Psychology. The Lord can work miracles with a grateful heart and do amazing things with that heart. It’s time we stop complaining so often because it closes the eyes of our hearts to our neighbors and it is time to start saying thank you.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Lastly, I present to you one of my favorite music artists named Emma Fradd.  Music has a way of bringing us closer to the things we truly desire and if we are not prudent, it can lead us down a path that has been traveled all too often that is destructive (CF Mt 7:14).  However, with Emma's music, I have found a depth that is very real and speaks directly to the human condition. A few of her songs I'd recommend downloading and spending time with in prayer are:  Losing InterestCrossConfirmed and Engraved,  Heavenly PhysicianWait  and if you are tired of the technology check out Crowded Isolation     As you listen, it may be helpful to check out her lyrics: here is the link for her lyrics.  Emma's music has helped me learn to empathize with others and to pray at the pierced side of Christ. Emma, if you ever read this, thank you for your dedication to music.


The Crucifix over time ought become a part of our every day life. As we enter into the Holiday Season, may our hearts proclaim Good Friday and no longer succumb to the busyness Black Friday

It is time to make every day your thanksgiving day by being Eucharistic.  As we enter into Christ the King Sunday, let us proclaim in our wounded hearts that Jesus is Lord and Jesus is King. Let us surrender to allow the mystery of the Crucifix enter into us so that we may be delivered and freed from all that is not Christ in our lives.

So what's it going to be? 
This choice is yours as he knocks at your heart's door.



Living in the Mystery,

Zach Weber


Sunday, November 9, 2014

The Mystery of One Talk & Discipleship & Advent

Very rarely in life do we listen to one CD and want to give it away because it changed our lives. I can recount the number of music CD's that I purchased as a kid and when I really loved one of the CD's I would hold on to it forever. If I brought it over to a friends house I would make sure I didn't leave it there because of how much I connected with the music. Maybe you can relate to having similar circumstances. What would've happened if we shared that CD with a friend so it could change their life? Would the CD have been good for them or worse?


Disciples Spread the Good News: For those of you who do not know, I felt the call to the priesthood at the  Men of Christ Conference on January 17th, 2007.  That day I was fed in so many different ways, but ultimately I was fed with the truth. The speakers were passionate, funny, honest, zealous, and ultimately were on fire with the Holy Spirit. As I left that conference, my brother PJ went to the table of Fr. Larry Richards and purchased a few talks on CD called "The Truth," "Confession" and "The Mass."  PJ listened to them a few days later and asked me listen to them because he was so amazed at how much truth the Holy Spirit was feeding him with. The talk on confession is what I heard at the Men of Christ Conference and I have never been the same since. PJ couldn't get enough because of how the truth helps the soul heal. He had to share it with someone else. We began to ask more frequently "why does the Church do that? instead of only looking at what the Church says.



Meeting you where you are at: I didn't understand too much about what I professed to believe every Sunday.  As I started to discern the call to be a disciple of Jesus it wasn't easy because I knew next to nothing about the Catholic Faith and the Priesthood. If there is one thing I've learned about the Catholic Church and the Priesthood it is that if you know next to little or nothing about it, then it can intimidate you or even seem pointless. One talk by Father Donald Calloway changed my life because of his radical conversion story. I could relate to the tension he was going through. I'd highly recommend listening to his story called No Turning Back. However, over time, I came to know through different CD's how the Catholic Liturgy is so Biblical it started to bring me to tears as to what I felt the Lord was calling me to discern priesthood as his disciple. Can you believe that at one point in my life I didn't know what it meant to be Catholic or what the difference between being a Catholic or Christian was? (The Lord met me where I was at with my pridefulness and lack of Catechesis) With 35,000 different denominations calling themselves Christian, there has to be one true Church where it all started. I started to ask questions like: What came first the Bible or the Church? What do we mean by God when we say God? I was confused about all of the different denominations and these CD's helped me see with more clarity. Many of the talks I listened to were defended by converts from Protestant denominations or Judaism. Additionally, the culture says that I should be making as much money as possible, diving into all of my passions with women, and not worrying about the consequences. What does the Church have to say about that? Then I heard Christopher West talk about the Theology of the Body and I found John Paul II's teaching calling me to a life of virtue and continence. Also, what about marriage and homosexuality? Fr. Mike Schmitz talk From Love, By Love, For Love blew me away. These CD's have helped me look for the why first in the Church instead of only focusing on the what. I am not a bookworm because I do not read right away to get interested in a subject. I'd consider myself more of a tapeworm (audio orientated) when learning a subject. If you like books, most websites that have different talks on the faith sell books too. Typically, by word of mouth or by a CD/MP3 I will get interested and then begin to do some reading. It's still a mystery to me to this day how God is working through media in a positive way.


Disciples Press Pause in Prayer or for Prayer: Just one CD changed my life and helped me to become more comfortable with the call to a disciple of Jesus Christ. I would go back to the CD's/MP3's over and over. The most important part of the talks is to pray with the themes/topics or press pause when something strikes your heart. The Lord desires us to talk to him through prayer when our heart is moved. I can remember going on long drives (sometimes 10 hours to Saint Meinrad Seminary) and pressing pause very often to talk to the Lord in prayer about something I just heard or when listening to a talk on the passion being moved to tears by the passion of Christ. (To grow in prayer is to move slow in prayer.) There would be times when I was working out, mowing the lawn, etc when I would be listening to a certain talk and I'd be drawn to talk to Jesus about it.  Most importantly, these talks helped me thirst for the Eucharist and for authentic community. Everything around me began to feel lacking when it wasn't supplemented with a truth or an invitation to look for a deeper reality with myself or others. These talks helped me discern the call to greatness as a disciple of Jesus Christ in his Church. We can even listen to the Bible on CD or apps on our phones now. Our excuses to not encounter Christ are dwindling by the hour.

Recommendation: Start! We all have to start somewhere. It is a lie that you are too old or too young. Don't fall into that trap. There are so many rich sources out there and when we hear the truth, our hearts will be moved by the Holy Spirt to help us desire it more and more. We are not idiots or stupid. When truth confronts us to make a choice, we have the freedom to engage it or wonder what could have been for days, months, and even years. Now is the time to engage your heart for the rest of your life.  Here are a few places to start engaging your call to discipleship and the call to greatness: 

Fr. Barron's Word on Fire (Check out the Sunday Homily Page)

Fr. Mike Schmitz Homilies (Great for High School and College Students)

Matthew Kelly's "Dynamic Catholic"

St. Joseph Communications

Prayer is the most important: I am saving the best for last! If we need to learn how to do anything, it is to learn how to pray. Often we miss the point of prayer in America because we are so focused on results, production, and numbers. We want to see results happening, but that's not the purpose of prayer. To add to that, we struggle with silence at first, but that's normal in this noisy culture.  \We don't know what to do with it because silence magnifies our most dominate thoughts and if they are not holy then we tend to become anxious. Our thoughts will not always be holy because of our disordered desires from concupiscence. After a while, it the silence will become more peaceful and natural. A few of resources I've come across on prayer are:

Prayer - Fr. Larry 

Glimpses Along the Way of the Cross

Catechism: 2725-2758

There are so many sources on prayer and we need pray about who to share them with.

I'm sure that there are more resources than this, but it's a great place to start. One CD or one MP3 could change your life forever and you may just want to share it with someone else. It's an invitation to be who you were created to be: a beloved disciple and to be strengthened in mind, body, and soul. If one of these talks touches your heart then share it with someone.

Have I given you enough resources to start with or to think about? I sure hope so, but the last three I will recommend are on Christmas and Advent. We are entering into the season of the mystery of the incarnation very soon! The Incarnation is the foundation of our faith.

The True Meaning of Christmas by Blessed Fulton J. Sheen

Journey through Advent - Fr. Barron

The Mystery of Christmas by Fr. Larry Richards


Living in the mystery and casting into the deep,

Zach Weber


Sunday, October 19, 2014

The Mystery of Sacrificial Love, More Beautiful Than France


Chartres Cathedral, France
This past week I had the opportunity to pilgrimage to France with 35 seminarians and 2 priests. It was a life changing experience. We visited Paris, Chartres, Normandy, Ars, etc. However, this morning at Mundelein Seminary we had the dedication of the Saint John Paul II Chapel. The beauty I saw there was more beautiful than all of the saints I saw in France because I saw
a saint who is living in deep deep pain from his battle with cancer.



Francis Cardinal George dedicated the seminary chapel with a mysteriously deep sense of Christ. He processed in on crutches. He walked to the ambo on crutches to give his homily. He walked from the presiders chair to dedicate the atlar on crutches. It was obvious that he was in pain, but he was loving his bride (the Church) with everything he had. He didn't complain, rather he seemed aware that his agonizing pain was not the focus and he needed to show the seminarians how to suffer with composure. How does someone who has cancer not complain? I was deeply moved by how he desires to love his bride to the end of his life as Christ did. Cardinal George spoke about how the time may be near for him to pass from this life and enter into the next with a calm and confident disposition. It was hard to hear at first and the apostles of the time of Jesus had a similar reaction when Jesus predicted his death (Mark 8:31-38). It seemed to me as if Cardinal George has now entered into the mystery of suffering that witnesses to a beauty that cathedrals and saints cannot bring.




Cardinal Francis George
Saint JPII with Parkinson's Disease

The witness (martyria) of the living saint never ceases to move the heart to an interior experience of God. To know that Saint John Paul II battled Parkinson's Disease while loving his bride to the end gave witness to thousands of people who now love Jesus because of that authentic witness. Cardinal George is following a very similar path. It is apparent his health is fading, but that doesn't change his desire to love his bride while he's in pain. To love one's spouse while in deep agonizing pain is what Christ did and continues to do.  To witness the most incomprehensible pain of a son being tortured, hated, scourged, mocked, spat upon, embarrassed, and ultimately crucified is what Mary did. Through power of the Holy Spirit God continues to witness through his beloved saints. The mystery of witnessing to a love that surpasses all loves is incredibly inspiring and simply beautiful. The witness of sacrificial love inspires other saints to the same thing.  That is how I hope we all want to live and to love: Till the end, without complaining, and accepting God's will with a firm confidence that we served Jesus to the best of our ability to give all the glory to God the Father.

Picture of Saint John Paul II in the Chapel



Living in the Mystery,

Zach Weber




Thursday, September 4, 2014

The Mystery of Listening and the Other Side


As a cradle Catholic I sometimes take for granted the scriptures that serve as a point of proof when it comes to the Sacraments. I've heard arguments that prove the truth of the Sacraments in the Church from the Bible and I've heard and seen and even experienced how humanizing they are from a psychological/emotional point of view. It is normal to have someone you can trust in life and ask him or her for forgiveness while admitting your failures. However, it is even more reassuring to know that you are truly forgiven. Jesus knew this and he asks us to listen to him. We need to remember that God is not dumb or a fool. Specifically I am speaking about the Sacrament of Reconciliation or Confession. The encounter with Christ in the Sacraments is powerful, life changing, and ultimately it is TRUE! This Sunday we will hear the Gospel from Matthew 18. Jesus says: 

"Amen, I say to you,
whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven,
and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven
."

This is one of the many places in scripture where we find the Sacraments in the Bible. When I was first beginning to journey with the Lord as his disciple, I saw this and said, "Sweet! There it is. Biblical truth that supports the Church's teaching on the Sacrament of Confession. Jesus is speaking directly to his Apostles who handed down the faith throughout the history of the Church." I am convinced (from experience and witnesses of other people) of the healing power of the Sacrament of Confession. Additionally, it is very normal and human to confess ones sins to another.  However, now that I am discerning the priesthood I am on the other side. I am thinking about what it will be like to hear confessions and keep the seal forever. I am thinking about how to allow Christ to work through me so I may listen effectively to truly be as conformed to Christ as I can at the time. 

Earlier in the Gospel of Matthew Jesus says: 

"If your brother sins against you,
go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. 
If he listens to you, you have won over your brother."

Did you catch that? IF HE LISTENS TO YOU. Now that I am discerning the other side of the confessional and of this Gospel I must become a man who listens. I will still participate in the Confession often (God willing as a priest), but things will definitely change if I become a priest and hear confessions. We hear it all of the time in the seminary that the people of God do not necessarily care what we say as long as we listen and people know that they are heard. Listening for the person being spoken to is an act of the will and boy it can be difficult at times, but it will not always be that way. Sometimes listening in a deep conversation can be as simple as replying, "Yes, oh my, ok,  nice, that's great, wow, etc." Listening doesn't always mean having the answer or finding the solution. I have found this true in life thus far with people who either can't accept the fact that they don't go to to Church anymore or if they have been hurt or betrayed in some way. (This woundedness can take many forms)

 Listening to someone who has been waiting to speak to someone they can trust can be simply related to the way you and I used to be or may be currently are in our prayer lives. This would be our (early) prayer life: We talk and talk.......and talk.......and talk....and talk.  Jesus patiently waits and maybe even says a few words and we keep talking while he patiently listens. However, when we patiently listen to him he wins us over because he calls to a life of simplicity, patience, virtue, holiness, etc. Essentially, Jesus invites us to a life of happiness and joy that is not of this world. There will still be struggles, but God will give us a sense of assurance through his bride the Chruch. He always provides. If we listen in prayer it will not seem like a burden to listen to those around us. We will actively participate in the life of Christ. The Gospels will come alive in our very midst.  Our one encounter with Jesus will turn into many encounters with Jesus. We will re-encounter him who is all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-present. We will grow in empathy for Jesus for all of the times we didn't listen in prayer and we will grow in compassion as we listen to others by learning what it is like to be his disciple.  




Once we are willing to listen and be listened to we will come to know the transforming power of the Sacrament of Confession. We all confess our sins in one fashion or another, whether it is outside of the Sacrament or not. However, are we listening? Or are we thinking about the past, the future, etc all of the time? Jesus is most present to us when we listen or when we are receptive/passive. As I discern the other side of Matthew 18, please pray for me that I learn the gift of listening while in seminary formation and I will continue to pray for you.

Maybe your face looks like this and you say, "This is what I do now!"



Lastly, where do you start to learn how to listen? Right now! If you think that you can't do it or have been making excuses throughout your reading of this blog then the evil one has been feeding you lies. Ask Jesus to bless the hell out of your life. It's a fun and powerful prayer. Spend some time with the Silent Jesus.  Pope Benedict Emeritus said, "The first language of God is silence." Learn to be comfortable with silence. Here is your challenge: Turn OFF the cell phone, tv, computer, ipod, radio, etc. Notice the things around you and repeat a simple prayer that will help engage your heart and mind. Take some deep breaths. Relax into your prayer. It will take time because the Evil One knows where this could all lead to (HAPPINESS, PEACE, JOY, ZEAL, PASSION FOR CHRIST, ETC). Start with 5 minutes. It will be a struggle at times, but the sacrifice will bear much fruit.  It might not make sense right away, but that's the mystery in it all. It doesn't have to make sense right away. If we learn to accept this, our lives will never be the same.

Living in the mystery!

Zach Weber

Thursday, August 14, 2014

The Mystery of the Earthquake and the Running Man



Well, everything is shaking around me.  It's an earthquake, yet this one is big. 7.1 to be exact. I know this is not normal. So what does a seminarian do at 5:15 in the morning? He prays! I prayed a Hail Mary as the picture on the wall swung like a pendulum on the wall and different things fell off of my shelf for 20 seconds. Then once it stopped I went out in the hall and saw the running man. He said, "Are you guys ok?" We all said we were fine. The running man told us to stay out in the hallway for a little bit, then he ran off to check on his sons.

Fr. Joel, OSB
The running man's name is Fr. Joel. He is a Benedictine Monk of Marmion Abbey in Illinois. While studying in Guatemala he brought a group of high school men down to help serve the poor. He did not expect to encounter an earthquake, yet he did. He ran to his sons to make sure they were safe. What story in scripture does this sound like to you? Immediately as I reflected on this moment in Guatemala while I was mowing the lawn yesterday (yes, I know it's a weird time to reflect) I thought of the Prodigal Son parable (see Luke 15). Yet, how often we do not run to the one's we care for. However, I would recommend running to prayer first. Run to to Eucharist where Jesus is truly present body, blood, soul, and divinity. Run to grab your Bible. Encounter Christ in the Scriptures. Run to grab your Rosary and ask the Blessed Mother for help. Run to grab your Catechism and pray.

Whether we like to admit it or not, we all have had events in our lives that literally feel like Earthquakes. Yet, the Father runs to us to make sure we are ok. He runs to his children in many different ways and we need to have a passive disposition. Psalm 46 says, "Be Still and Know that I am God." If we can internalize these of words truth, comfort, and trust then what else matters?
Sometimes we try to cross the roads that have been
destroyed by earthquakes. Maybe we are not supposed
to travel across them. Maybe it is God that is supposed
cross the beaten road and allow him to come to us.

Stay in the mystery.
Reflect on the events of life.
You never know, God might just reveal himself to you while you are mowing the lawn.

God Bless!

Zach





Sunday, July 20, 2014

The Mystery of the Poor - Tears for Bread & Thanksgiving

Gratto
Our Lady of Lourdes, Pray for us!

Without a doubt the poor in Guatemala have pierced my heart and I have been drawing tears for bread from the experiences. When I first arrived hear in early June I had a deep sense of God wanting me to be here to teach me new things about sacrifice and serving. The adjustment to living in a climate that is 7000 feet above sea level while learning a new language has been a different experience of exhaustion. Around our third day here we walked down to the local Wal-Mart to pick up some odds and ends while getting to know the city a little. The Mall is very close by and as we walked I saw some people begging for money. The poor. It became really real. At the time, the Mother Teresa Quotes kept running through my head and heart: 
Love to be real, it must cost—it must hurt—it must empty us of self.....
When a poor person dies of hunger it has not happened because God did not take care of him or her. It has happened because neither you nor I wanted to give that person what he or she needed....
If you judge people then you don't have time to love them....
We need silence to be able touch souls...
Each one of them is Jesus in disguise....Hungry for love, He looks at you. Thirsty for kindness, He begs of you. Naked for loyalty, He hopes in you. Homeless for shelter in your heart, He asks of you. Will you be that one to Him? 
You can't feed just the body without feeding the soul. You must feed the body and the soul.
THE LIST GOES ON AND ON.


Fr. Quinn Mann





Then as I continued to pray about the poor in Guatemala and a quote from Fr. Quinn Mann, founder of Catholic Youth Expeditions (Brief Bio of Father Quinn Mann ) came into my heart of which I am very grateful for. This past December Fr. Quinn pulled me aside and said "Zach, every time I watch the movie Moneyball I think of you. In the movie the guys are trying too hard and the GM of the team tells the players, "You don't always have to go for the double play, let the game come to you." Zach, Let the game come to you. It's been on my heart to tell you this. Let the game come to you." So I began to pray with this quote in my heart to become more passive and let the game aka God's will come to me. It changed my experience of prayer forever.


If you have not read my last blog you may want to start there before reading any further. The Mystery of the Boy without Hands


One weekend here the seminarians were walking back from a day in Central Park and as we left Wal-Mart, we walked across the street via causeway. They do not have side walks like we do in the United States so they have structures that allow you to walk over the road in heavy traffic areas. As we walked over the street on this particular day we saw a girl who was possibly 10-13 years old passed out, very dirty, no shoes, and with very little clothing laying on the causeway alone. We all were struck.  We walked passed her and my heart was struck with tears for bread. I didn't know whether to tap her on the shoulder or what to do. I couldn't keep walking with the others. Enough is enough. "GIVE MY PEOPLE BREAD ZACH! STOP PASSING BY THE POOR!" (This is what I heard in my heart) I turned around and placed a granola bar by her hand and said a short prayer. A few of us decided to go to the local Orphanage the next day. This is where Lord started revealing himself to us in a new way. 



As I prayed that night, an experience of deep intimacy with the Lord and His Word kept echoing in my soul from the summer at IPF. The Story of The Good Samaritan  in the Gospel of Luke 10:29-37 was reminding me of what kind of Priest God is calling me to be and what kind of priest I am not called to be.  If God continues to guide me down this path I am called to be a priest that is Pure Patient Mercy. Being patient with others and with myself is one of my biggest struggles. Also, to be merciful with others and with myself is the other area of struggle. If God continues to conform my heart into the heart of one of his priests I am not called to be a priest who passes by the poor. I must stop and become pure patient mercy. These are the son's and daughter's of God. God willing if I become a priest, these will be my spiritual son's and daughter's. Genuine Father's sacrifice for their children.



At XelaPan
Patricia, Jon, and I


Experience 1


Fellow Seminarian Jon Thorsen and myself were on our way to meet up with the volunteers from Marmion Abbey & Academy that were visiting for the week. Jon and I had a staff member named Patricia visiting from Mundelein to check in and see how the experience of Guatemala was going. Our plan to meet up with Patricia and the Marmion Group was changed as we arrived about an hour earlier than we expected. Jon and I sat down to wait and a man approached Jon to sell him rugs. Jon said he didn't have any money for rugs, but the man persisted. Eventually Patricia found us and by this time Jon had 4 rugs on his lap. Then a poor man asked Jon and I for some money, but we said we only had money for bread.  I had some french fries from McDonalds that I gave the man, but he still persisted. Again, Mother Teresa was interceding for us as we brought the man over to a nearby baker called "XelaPan."  Patricia and Jon went inside to buy the man some bread and I waited outside. As they came out I asked the man if we could pray for him. What a blessed experience. We prayed an Our Father and asked the Blessed Mother to watch over this man. We did our best to feed his body as well as his soul. We only had money for bread is what we say now when people ask us about this experience.





Jon and the Man with Rugs


Experience Two:


Some of the seminarians visited the Orphanage and I was struck at how rich the poor are and how poor I am. In the United States, we seem to think that being poor means not having any money. That is a lie because these son's and daughter's of God had nothing, yet they were rich in joy. Most of them were unable to talk and some were unable to see, yet they were happy. (Being poor stretches across many different criteria.)  I was blessed for the past two weekends to visit the orphanage.  I was able to detach from one of my vices that I struggle with and that is vice is Vanity. Essentially vanity is worrying about what others think when you make a decision rather than being concerned only with God.  I was able to hold hands with blind children, play catch with plastic balls with very deformed people, and to roll around on a dirty floor with a little girl who has Down Syndrome. The ages range from babies to people in their 40's. We were able to push some of the children around in their wheel chairs. We were able to feed the children. I even had the opportunity to hold a little boy who was probably about one year old and felt his wet pants against my arm. Yes that means that he wetted himself. However, he snuggled right up against my shoulder and was so happy to be held. (What a great image to bring to prayer. Try it! It's exactly what God wants to do with us. He doesn't care if we are full of sin, he just wants to hold us.)  Most of these children were abandoned because they are not beautiful in the World's Eyes. However, they are beautiful to God. The last experience that the Lord revealed to me in the visit yesterday was pushing a young boy around the courtyard and allowing some of the SUN or should I say SON shine on him. So when it was possible I allowed the sun to shine on him, yet at the same time I was able to allow the Son to shine on me as I pushed God's son. THE MYSTERY! What joy it brings to the heart that thirsts for authentic love.



Picture of the Hermanalita (Hermanalita = Little Sister)


The Third and Final Experience:


On Friday a few of us stopped by XelaPan. It was Brian's (one of the seminarians) last day here, so we all decided to join him on his trip to XelaPan.  While there I encountered a girl who could not have been more than 15 years old and she asked me for some money for milk for her baby. She was so innocent and shy as she held her child. She reminded me so much of Mary. Poor, innocent, and was not afraid to ask for help. My gut told me to give her some money. I needed to buy some bread first so I could break down a large bill. After I purchased some bread I gave her some money and said a prayer in the depth of my heart. What would you do? The poor need our help. I was struck by her humility. She was patient, she was polite, and she had a baby. I believe that the Lord has blessed me with situations like these to help conform my heart unto a servants heart. Why? Because that is the life of Christ. In the Gospel of Matthew Chapter 20:28 Jesus says, "The Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.”





In the Gospel of Matthew Chapter 25 Jesus says, "And the king will say to them in reply, Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me." Why do we serve the poor? We serve the poor because Christ is the poor. If your heart is not moved by those with less than you then it might be time to get on your knees and repent. Blessed Mother Teresa lived the Five Finger Gospel. She would say, that you do unto the least of mine (and as she pointed to her fingers she would say) 1.You 2. Do 3. It. 4. To 5. Me.  



Now, whenever I travel into the city I always bring food with me. Money is not the solution. I give what I have and try to pray with the people if they are willing. If not, I stop and say a prayer for them. If I am unable to give some food I make the sign of the cross as I pass by them. Have I shed tears over my experiences with the poor? YES! The Lord has turned my tears into bread for the poor. These are Son's and Daughters of Christ. They have pierced my heart. I wish I could tell more stories of the people I've encountered, but I'll save those for the next time I see you in person.


Thanksgiving


 I would like to thank the Diocese of Green Bay for sending me here. I would like to thank Fr. Quinn Mann for his advice. I would like to thank Amador Vargas for giving me the book "The Way of a Pilgrim" because he rarely ever traveled without bread. I would like to thank Fr. Anthony, OSB from St. Meinrad for reminding me to lower myself to the level of God's people. (For those of you who do not know I am six feet four inches tall) Fr. Anthony said, "Match your eyes and heart with those you serve whenever you can." I'd also like to thank my 9th grade teacher Mr. Wyrembek who said, "There are two types of people in this world. People that live for themselves and people that live for others." Lastly, thank you to all of you who pray for me. Wow. Through your prayers the Lord is changing my heart in ways I could've never imagined. It's all grace. ALL IS GRACE. Thank you for changing my tears into tears for bread for the poor. The tears of the poor are the tears that ask for this bread.






God Bless You!


Zach





Feeding two girls with Down Syndrome
For More Photos ://www.guatesol.ch/fotos-hogar_es.html